Eat, Drink and Be Mortal - hosted by Grace and Grit and Rachel Langenohl, End of Life Doula

Do you watch the Emmy award winning series The Pitt? If so, you have been introduced to an end of life doula in the show. I'm so grateful my profession is gaining more attention and understanding. Would you like to know more? I answered some questions for our upcoming event - please read on!

We hope you can join us on March 4th @6pm for our next Grace & Grit event

𝙀𝙖𝙩, 𝘿𝙧𝙞𝙣𝙠, & 𝘽𝙚 𝙈𝙤𝙧𝙩𝙖𝙡

RSVP to join us here  https://www.eventbrite.com/.../eat-drink-be-mortal...

Since many in our group may not know what an End of Life Doula is (or you do, thanks to The Pitt ) I had a Q&A with Rachel to help you find out more...

𝙌: 𝙒𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙞𝙨 𝙖𝙣 𝙀𝙣𝙙 𝙤𝙛 𝙇𝙞𝙛𝙚 𝘿𝙤𝙪𝙡𝙖?

A: While the term is new to many, the role itself is ancient. For generations, people often died at home surrounded by family members who cared for them physically, emotionally and spiritually. In many ways, those loved ones were serving as end of life doulas.

Today, families are often spread across different states. Modern medicine has changed the way people are cared for. End of life doulas can help bridge the space between medical care and family care, by providing an additional supportive presence.

𝙌: 𝙃𝙤𝙬 𝙬𝙤𝙪𝙡𝙙 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙙𝙚𝙛𝙞𝙣𝙚 𝙮𝙤𝙪𝙧 𝙥𝙪𝙧𝙥𝙤𝙨𝙚?

A: My purpose is to help people who are ill, and the people who love them, find peace, meaning and joy in this last season of life. If you’ve ever cared for someone who was chronically ill or at end of life, you know it can be a very challenging time. Even simple tasks can become overwhelming when emotions, decisions and care needs converge.

My role in working with a family is first, to listen. I try to understand what a family needs most, where they feel stretched thin, and what would bring greater peace in this journey in the moment and the days ahead. Together, we create practical ways to make this time the best it can be.

Support may include coordinating help from neighbors, friends and extended family who would like to contribute but aren’t sure how. I can organize meals, arrange schedules for household tasks and visitors. I also personally provide respite for caregivers who shoulder tremendous responsibility and often experience burnout. Respite allows them to rest, restore and tend to their own wellbeing so they can continue to care from a place of strength instead of exhaustion.

I also help families reflect on what matters most to them now. Are there conversations waiting to happen? Words of forgiveness or gratitude to share? Wishes to express? Together we can explore these meaningful moments and make sure nothing important is left unsaid.

Legacy projects are another sacred part of our time together. It might include recording life stories, preserving handwritten recipes, organizing photographs, helping someone earmark keepsakes or write letters to someone they love.

When the end is near, I provide vigil support – sitting bedside to provide a calm presence if loved ones need to rest or if they prefer to have additional support themselves during this part of the journey.

𝙌: 𝙒𝙝𝙖𝙩 𝙚𝙭𝙥𝙚𝙧𝙞𝙚𝙣𝙘𝙚 𝙙𝙤 𝙮𝙤𝙪 𝙝𝙖𝙫𝙚 𝙞𝙣 𝙨𝙥𝙚𝙣𝙙𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙩𝙞𝙢𝙚 𝙬𝙞𝙩𝙝 𝙩𝙝𝙤𝙨𝙚 𝙖𝙩 𝙚𝙣𝙙 𝙤𝙛 𝙡𝙞𝙛𝙚?

A: My passion for this work began when a close friend was diagnosed with ALS. I visited her weekly at her hospice facility. Although she received excellent hospice care, there were human needs; companionship, presence, small acts of care that extended beyond medical support.

After she died, I became a hospice companion and vigil volunteer at the same facility for six years. I visited with patients, worked on puzzles, listened to them talk about their life, took them on walks or wheelchair rides. I also sat bedside when patients were actively dying, alerting the nurses when I saw breathing changes and letting them know when someone took their last breath.

I also worked as a hospice volunteer coordinator – training and supporting volunteers who offered one-on-one companionship to patients.

I received my end of life doula certification through the University of Vermont Larner School of Medicine and eventually founded Sacred Time.

Before raising my children and dedicating time to volunteer service, I worked as an anchor and reporter, speechwriter and deputy press secretary for Wisconsin Governor Tommy Thompson, and as a strategic communications consultant for American Family Insurance. My communications background is an important component of what I do now because at end of life, honest and compassionate communication is essential.

𝙌: 𝘼𝙣𝙮 𝙥𝙖𝙧𝙩𝙞𝙣𝙜 𝙩𝙝𝙤𝙪𝙜𝙝𝙩𝙨?

A: We thoughtfully prepare for so many important moments in life. End of life deserves the same care and intention. Planning ahead can bring clarity, comfort and peace both for the person nearing death and those who love them.